LETTERMAN DOES IT RIGHT….

Or, at least his writers do….
TEN THINGS WE SELDOM THINK ABOUT:

#10
Life is sexually transmitted.

#9
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate
at which a person can die.

#8
Men have two emotions; Hungry and Horny.
If you see him without an erection,
make him a sandwich.

#7
Give a person a fish and you feed him for a day.
Teach a person to use the internet, and he
won’t bother you for weeks.

#6
Some people are like a slinky…
Not really good at anything,
but you still can’t help but smile
when you shove them down the stairs.

#5
Health nuts are going to feel stupid some day,
lying in hospital beds dying of nothing.

#4
All of us could take a lesson from the weather.
It pays no attention to criticism.

#3
Why does a SLIGHT tax INCREASE cost you $200,
and a SUBSTANTIAL tax CUT save you $30?

#2.
In the sixties people took acid to make the
world weird, now the world IS weird, and
we take Prozac to make it normal.

And, the #1 thing to ponder:
We know exactly where one cow with
mad-cow-disease is located among millions
and millions of cows in America, but we don’t
have a clue as to where millions of illegal
immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe
we should put the Dept. of Agriculture in charge
of Immigration.

“Life is like a jar of Jalapeno’s.
What you do today might burn
your ass tomorrow”

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One Response to “LETTERMAN DOES IT RIGHT….”

  1. Who ever YOU want it to be Says:

    Chuckle, chuckle….I musta fallen asleep before the Top Ten or was tuned to another channel. Thanks for sharing.

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